decisons decisions

When is the beginning of life?
Is it when you take your 1st breath, or
when you're still in the womb.
People ask how the girl can be so stupid,
but they for get that it takes two.

the guy's think how this ruins their lives.
If you don't want to have a baby I totally understand.
But it's not just you in this,
and if the girl decides to keep it grow up and be a man.

The guys isn't the only one at fault.
Like i said it takes two.
And since women are smarter than men,
they should've thought it through.

Now two people have to make the hardest decision known to man.
To either have and abortion or go with the pregnancy.
Remeber, don't just think about your lives,
think about the baby's.

confessial

I don't care about anyone and no one cares about me and that's the way it should be. I wanna go away and disappear not die but get away from here. Everyone calls me stupid or dumb. I've heard it so much I've gotten numb and I can't feel the pain when I bleed and I watch as people turn away from me as they see my scars and the pain. That's why I feel peaceful when it rains, because the sky is so dark and it looks like it's crying. That's the way I feel when I'm hiding so no one has to know what's wrong with me. Sometimes I want people to see. But if someone does they always ask questions about all the decisions I make to my body. There's not one person who sees me for me. Even my mom said I'm not the daughter she wanted me to be. She always has something to say like how I'm predictable and I always wear my hair the same way. She says that I should be the daughter she dreamed of and not someone she should be ashamed of. It's funny how I'm writing all this in American Lit with people sitting all around and not noticing a little bit that I'm writing some but not all actually not even close to all my feelings I guess I have to deal with the things. The one I', used to right now is being alone, and the bells about to ring so i can go home. So I got to go.

confusion

why do I feel depressed all the time?
One little thing pulls a trigger in my mind.
Then all of a sudden I start thinking negative.
It's probably so sensitive.
Sometimes I wish I was really dead.
Pop some pills to clear my head.
I bet some people won't even care.
Probably shed a tear here or there.
Just because they'll maybe feel guilty,
because they never got the chance to know me.
but right now I can careless.
I'm tired of this stupid mess.
I just want to know why do I always feel depressed.

Complications

Argument after argument.
Fight after fight.
The darkness of our souls,
revealed to all at night.

The impurities run down our ravines.
One by one we slowly take a drink,
into our troubled thoughts that empower our minds,
and then we soon speak before we can think.

Buttons are always pushed.
Most of us soon can't see clearly.
The deafness of our beating hearts,
are missed by the ones we find dearly.

Assumptions are made,
about who started it all.
For the one who didn't and held their own,
can hold their head tall.

this is TOTALLY unfair!

I LOVE how we can't go to the taste of chicago today which TREY SONGZ was performing at because charlene has work. Everyone is going tomorrow. The day I told people I can't go because I have an orthodontist appointment. They go weather I can or can't go, but when someone else can't go EVERYONE can't go. DO YOU SEE THE UNFAIRNESS HERE?!?!?!?! This is TOTAL bullshit. FUCK EVERYONE! I don't even know why I hang out with them...oh wait yea i do! Because I have no fucking friends! I dumped my friends to hang with them. I'M SOOOOO DUMB! They don't dump their friends to hang with me but I'm expected to dump EVERYTHING that I'm doing to hang with them or I'm a total bitch, the bad guy, the party pooper or whatever! You'd think that they would at least let me a part in deciding in what to do. I feel like a pack mule. They drag me along if they want something or need me to do something. I'm sick and tired of it. My mom is right I just push everything aside like nothing is wrong and don't put in my opinion. It's time to say SHUT THE FUCK UP AND LISTEN TO WHAT I HAVE TO FUCKING SAY. I don't want to be the odd man out anymore. Yes I'm the youngest, yes I'm the most inexperienced, and yes I'm the annoying little debbie downer, but I am apart of the group and I want to be heard. That's all I want.