confessial

I don't care about anyone and no one cares about me and that's the way it should be. I wanna go away and disappear not die but get away from here. Everyone calls me stupid or dumb. I've heard it so much I've gotten numb and I can't feel the pain when I bleed and I watch as people turn away from me as they see my scars and the pain. That's why I feel peaceful when it rains, because the sky is so dark and it looks like it's crying. That's the way I feel when I'm hiding so no one has to know what's wrong with me. Sometimes I want people to see. But if someone does they always ask questions about all the decisions I make to my body. There's not one person who sees me for me. Even my mom said I'm not the daughter she wanted me to be. She always has something to say like how I'm predictable and I always wear my hair the same way. She says that I should be the daughter she dreamed of and not someone she should be ashamed of. It's funny how I'm writing all this in American Lit with people sitting all around and not noticing a little bit that I'm writing some but not all actually not even close to all my feelings I guess I have to deal with the things. The one I', used to right now is being alone, and the bells about to ring so i can go home. So I got to go.